Category: Writing

  • Hanging On

    I am exhausted and finding it difficult to complete all my stated daily goals. Once this post is published, I’ll just have Manhunt left on my list. But I’m partly too excited (Key West tomorrow!) and finding it too hard to stay awake. I haven’t even packed, but it’s just a three day trip, nothing major. I don’t go crazy like some people with five different outfits per day.

    The only thing I really feel compelled to write about are the dreams I had Tuesday night. I didn’t mention them here on my blog, but I sent my friends on discord a brief summary right when I woke up. The weirdest one involved my dead aunt.

    She was alive in my dream, and someone shot her in the head. I don’t remember seeing it, but I was right there when it was taking place in the dream. I don’t remember seeing my aunt really, not at all, not once in the dream. What I remember seeing is a book.

    So my dead aunt/book in my dream, who was shot in the head, is lying on the ground. She’s a book, mind you, but there’s blood. Then my grandmother is there (who is also dead and died shortly after my aunt did in real life), and she’s wailing uncontrollably. I get the distinct feeling I’m glad my aunt is dead, but I know I didn’t kill her.

    My uncle (aunt’s brother, my grandmother’s son) shows up and I make the decision to move “the body” because an ambulance hasn’t come. All of a sudden, there’s another book. This time, it’s a family Bible, and for whatever reason, I want to place my dead aunt/book on the family Bible. It’s almost as though it’s a coffin for her.

    My uncle looks on uncomfortably. The bloody carcass of the book/my aunt is wet, and the family Bible’s pages are very thin and crinkly. The blood soaks it almost instantly. I get the feeling my uncle wants me to put her back. He says no, but I know he would have rather me just not move her in the first place.

    I wake up.

  • Short and Sweet

    I’m too exhausted to make a lengthy post (mind you, I normally write 4 paragraphs anyway 😅), but I have been sticking to the plan. Work out done. Posting in progress. Tarot before bed. And, of course, reading Manhunt.

    In less than 48 hours I’ll finally be in Key West for a long weekend vacation. I don’t want to get my hopes up, but even if I don’t personally hook up, as long as I get messy or see some messy stuff, I’ll be satisfied. Who am I kidding? Just being out of Miami will be worth it.

    Just one day of work between me and sweet, sweet vacation. Lort, give me the strength!

  • Day Two

    I did it! This makes two days in a row now that I force myself to read, work out, write, and meditate on the tarot. I’d be lying if I said it was easy, but at least I fucking did it. Surprisingly, writing has been the biggest challenge, and forcing myself not to go back and edit every second is the worst, but I’m getting by.

    I dipped my toes into part two of Manhunt. The sex is… interesting. I’ve never been with a trans person or a woman, so it’s taking me to places I’ve never been, and I’m a more well-rounded person because of it. Go read the book.

    A large amount of my time went into playing Destiny 2 this weekend. I managed to finish the Beyond Light storyline and I’m gonna start The Witch Queen soon. I didn’t have any plans to buy the latest expansion, but it’s on sale right now for $35 so I just might get it if I’m in the mood to treat myself.

    Speaking of treating myself! This coming weekend I’ll be going to Kew West. I’m going with my roommate and another friend of ours. We’ve all been countless times, so it’s no big deal, but it’ll be nice to get away. I love the drive down there. It’s extremely scenic, and since I’m driving from Miami, it doesn’t take too long.